Online Hose Suppliers

This transition from Spring to Summer has already been an interesting one.  I do have the pool operating a month earlier, in spite of the fact that I had several setbacks with sanitation, pumps, filters and faulty defective hoses.  That is now in the past and I currently have a terrific hose that seems to be working quite well for now.  But I never want to go through that experience again, so I’ve set about searching for a hose supplier who will keep me stocked up on the perfect hose.  Since there are no quality hose suppliers in my area, I’ve had to look for suppliers on the internet. Of course, when you do this online thing, it is always important to introduce yourself, state what you are looking for and what needs you hope the sought after item will meet.  I followed all these protocols perfectly and have been flooded with many interesting responses.  Most of them fakes, as they were exaggerating about the length, width, quality, durability and flexibility of their hoses.  In addition, they were charging far too much for the very minimal and routine functions the hoses were capable of.  I decided not to settle, since dealing with my current (make do) hose is working better than I think any of those hoses would work.  However, I would like a real hose with a longer warranty than the one I am currently using.

Something very interesting entered my inbox this afternoon.  Here is the note from the latest would be hose supplier:

Dear Ms. Wild Mind,

Further to your comments regarding hoses. I am pleased to report that one of the hoses in question has been tested and found to be functioning to the standard you require.

This type of hose requires constant care and attention. May I suggest that you adopt a regimen of ongoing maintenance even when you are not using the equipment. There are several products readily available which, when regularly applied, will ensure that the hose remains useable over an extended period and will delay the inevitable withering and consequent perishing.

Respectfully,

The Last Hose Supplier You’ll Ever Need

This seemed very interesting to me, so I responded with the following:

Dear Mr. Last,

I am very interested in learning more about your hose.  I would be especially interested in the regimen of maintenance you suggest as well as the products you supply to prevent the inevitable withering and perishing of the hose.  I am unavailable to discuss this now, but would be willing to discuss this at length later this evening should you so desire.  Of course, before purchase, I am wondering if there is an opportunity to discover exactly the functionality of the hose in question.  My last hose was guaranteed to last a lifetime and began faltering in its performance in less than six months in spite of excellent care, maintenance and frequent use. As the result of this experience, I want to be very certain what it is I am purchasing, as you can well understand, I am sure. I am certainly willing to invest should I find that one amazing hose.

I look forward to hearing from you at your earliest convenience.

Respectfully,

Ms. Wild Mind

P.S. I am also well aware that every hose comes with a price tag.  I think it would be important to discuss the various costs of purchasing the hose earlier rather than later.  I would, of course, be interested in discussing sales price, taxes, shipping and handling fees and, of course, since we are dealing with an international transaction here, whether any customs costs or import/export fees exist. 

P.P.S.  I am perfectly able and more than willing to pay whatever rate is required for a hose of the type and quality I seek.  As you know many online hose suppliers are frauds and I would like every opportunity to discern that your hose is exactly as you say before signing a purchase agreement.

Hmmm, it will be interesting to see how this transaction turns out.

Worthless Hose!!!!

The Old Worthless Hose
The Old Worthless Hose

Just as I predicted in my last post, that worthless old hose gave way today. When I drove in the driveway after an errand tonight, I was anticipating a fun frolic in my backyard pool.  Instead, I noticed a flood of water streaming down the neighbor’s driveway.  I knew it had to be hose failure on my filter since the neighbors do not water their lawn. 

There is nothing so frustrating, disappointing and infuriating as hose failure at a time when you are so anticipating and relying upon the pleasure that hose will bring if it actually does what it is designed to do.  But timing is everything!  My hose failed just as I was anticipating a lovely evening swim.  The filter now cannot do it’s job properly and the pool has lost 4 inches of water in just a few moments. 

The New Longer Flexible Hose!  Ahhh!
The New Longer Flexible Hose! Ahhh!

The hose spurted water in every direction completely flooding an entire area of my yard and my neighbor’s yard.  I did not receive the relaxing, enjoyable experience of activity in my pool.  Instead, I had to wait. 

Now I am tense, crabby, irritated and actively searching for a longer flexible new hose!  Breaking off and spilling out so do not work for me!

Summer Preparations–Lessons Learned

filter9The Wild Mind has been busy the last four days working on getting ready for summer.  This readiness involves dealing with the contraption you see here.  No, it is not the latest model sex toy (wait, maybe it could be with just a little improvisation).This is a pool filter.  It connects to the pool by various hoses similar to the one you see in the picture.  There is a hose for outgoing water and a hose that takes in water from the pool to be filtered.  My contraption is old.  The hoses have not been replaced since I purchased the thing.  The contraption and it’s hoses get a great deal of use too, so it is critical that everything is in proper working order.  This morning (at times I can be a morning person) when I hooked up the contraption to the pool the hose that connects the skimmer to the pool kept breaking off.  In fact, it broke off so many times that by the time I actually started the pump up, it burst again, dousing me.  It was now too short to do it’s job properly.  There is also another hose on this contraption (wouldn’t you like to have two hoses for just such an emergency?). This second hose connects the pool to the filter (that big bulbous part of the contraption) .  This hose was far longer and more flexible than the hose that was splitting and breaking off.  I switched the hoses, the pump works beautifully, however that old hose is still an old hose and will within a very short time begin cracking and breaking off from the pool again.  This old hose segment needs to be replaced soon.

Six lessons learned for The Wild Mind: (no, I did not say “Sex Lessons Learned by The Wild Mind! Sheesh!)

1.  Old hoses will eventually need to be replaced when they are unable to perform the task they were designed for.

2.  Old hoses that remain long and flexible are far more useful for a far longer period of time.

3.  Old hoses that break off and become too short are worthless.

4. Hoses that spray stuff everywhere except the appropriate destination are annoying!

5.  Maybe there are times when having a spare hose around is a good thing?

6.  The Wild Mind really, seriously needs a new hose!  (Wait, I think anyone who’s been reading this blog for any length of time has already figured that out!)

Now where to find a decent, lengthy, flexible hose that will go the distance even after a tremendous amount of use?  Hmmmm.

What Begins With “F” And Ends With “uck”?

The answer is, of course, “Fire Truck”! 

Remember back a few posts when we were talking about tools, boxes and “a man and his tools”?  I’ve come across a new kind of tool box.  This one is the tool box of all tool boxes and it is so portable!  Look!  Here it is:

firetrucks2

The trusty fire truck!  Now, you might not be aware of this, unless you are a firefighter, but a fire truck is really just a big tool box on wheels. 

Visual Dictionary Online explains a fire truck as  a motor vehicle “designed to transport fire-fighting personnel and materials and to supply water to the fire hose nozzles”.  Hmmmm, sounds interesting to me.

The fire truck then is a tool box filled with hoses and the personnel to operate the hoses (aka, hosers). 

However, while every one states that the fire truck is specifically designed to put out fires, I certainly believe that if given half a chance the fire truck could also be useful in starting a certain number of fires as well. 

Let’s take a closer look.

fire-trucks_1

I mean, this is just too good to be true!  What other tool box do you know of  that comes with its own “pumper”?  There are even “grab handles”, and a “deluge gun”.  Seriously, depending upon how big the deluge and where the grab handles are, things could get really exciting!  Seriously?  Flames are burning hotter with thoughts of all the uses for such a fantastic tool box on wheels.

Don’t stop there did you notice all the bonus toys?  There is a control panel, not one, but two “hydrant intakes”, and a “rear step” as well as the regular “storage compartment”.  And, of course, dont’ forget what the fire truck is most popular for…

hoses

The hoses!  Think of all the fun that could be had, girls, if you had your own fire truck stocked with these hoses! 

Ahhhh, but the fun doesn’t stop there.  The fire truck is the only tool box I know that comes fully equipped with live beings to man the hoses!  And, yes, most of of them are just down right amazing to look at let alone to observe in action when they arrive on the scene to put out your personal fire.   And, ladies, have you noticed how they usually work in pairs????

ffightersinactionworking in pairs

Seriously?  I think the fire truck is the ideal tool box for any hot flash, personal raging fire you might encounter. 

 

Disclaimer:  Absolutely no disrespect is meant to any one who is a firefighter or works in such a valuable capacity.  I think our firefight fighter and law enforcement officials are very valuable.  I do not intend to in any way denigrate what you to do keep us safe and alive.  This was all just good natured tawdry fun with no malicious intent whatsoever.

The Tool To Have On Hand

rubber-finger-tipsNow, here’s a tool everyone needs.  The Rubber Finger Tip.  Yep.  Good for what ails you or her.  They even come in bulk quantities so you never have to go searching for where you left it last time you used it.  boxoffingersI mean, really, look at the texture on those babies!  Run out today and get yourself a box.  You’ll be glad you did.

Insomnia–In Six Sentences or Less, More or Less

Wide awake while everyone else is sound asleep.

Tossing and turning, physically and mentally, I get up to get a drink of water and turn on the computer.

I should read a book instead since the computer won’t help me sleep and reading a book in bed is warmer.

I could have used a really wild, blow-your-brains out party last night. 

Not really.

I don’t party, I’m not like that, but I could have used something last night or early this morning or right now.

 

Or…how about this…

 

Silence greets me in the still morning hours.

Everyone slumbers while I lie awake tossing, turning, unable to doze.

Getting up, I choose the computer instead of a book, I need to post something here today anyway.

I approve some comments, play with words, begin to feel that sweet drowsy feeling creep forward from behind my eyes.

I’m going back to bed.

Last one there’s a rotten egg!!!! 😉

It Helps To Be Well Equipped!

handymanHave you noticed how a good handy man is always well equipped?  If he’s handy, he’s got the tool for the job, no matter what the job.  This is something that I used to take for granted until I entered the dating scene in my 40’s.  I’ve since learned that not all men are handy nor are they all vested with what I would consider a well stocked tool kit.  Some of them are even lacking certain necessary power tools in their arsenal.  Little did I know but this is becoming a real concern.  Men are losing their tools at an astonishing rate.  Read about this here. How people like this hope to keep a relationship alive, let alone a house in good repair is beyond me!

I’m not exactly the home repair goddess and most of the tools I started my last marriage with (yes, they were mine, dag nabbit!) walked out the door when he did, so I’ve been gradually replacing my tools as I do various jobs around the house.  Some of the required tools are obvious, a hammer, screwdriver, you know.  And, no matter what anyone says, with tools, just as with sex, size does matter…or…more accurately fit matters. 

For example, hammers come in various sizes. hammers It is important when I am picking out a hammer that I don’t choose one that is too large or I will not be able to adequately handle the job.  I will hurt myself and damage the project.  On the other hand, if the hammer is the right size, fits in my hand nicely, isn’t to heavy or too light, I can complete any job quickly, skillfully and with great pleasure and satisfaction in a job well done.

Purchasing tools is not an easy thing if you’re a woman who has absolutely no clue what most of the tools are used for. Just as going to the local pick up bar can be an overwhelming thing for those just venturing onto the dating scene, going into Lowe’s or Home Depot to pick out a tool kit is just as overwhelming  for the ignorant or inexperienced.  And I was ignorant. 🙂   I found myself  thinking all sorts of things like, “Wow!  Will I ever need something that large?”, “How many of those does one need?” and “Wow!  That sure looks cool but what do you do with it?”  (Please, don’t ever take me to the local adult store….I had a tough enough time with the power tools at Lowe’s!)

Cripes!  When it comes to cetain tools, I’m still ignorant, but less so than I was two years ago. I’ve decided every woman needs her own set of tools and she needs to know how to use them…and they must be the right size and fit for her.  Recently, I made this purchase which I think is genius:

 housepainting-2009

No, self respecting man is going to walk off with any of that stuff!  Plus, if you’re working with your good buddy Mr. Sexy HandyMan it is less likely his tool accidentally ends up in the your tool kit or your tools in his, unless, of course, you want it that way. 😉  Even then, after the repair job is over, you can easily pick up your tools and walk away.

Romance Is A Game Best Played On A Level Playing Field-Lessons Learned

Curtains rise, lights up full center stage spotlight on The Wild Mind who is dressed in tight  jeans, flattering trendy top, pumps with stilletto heels, hair perfectly coifed and make up on.  Cue happy music playing softly in the background.  The Wild Mind addresses the audience.

I am really grateful that now there is complete closure not just with The Beau, but the I.J. (Yes, we had a “conversation” also in the last two weeks.  I haven’t written about it because it was a little sad and I’ve been too busy writing and doing other things). 

beerhandsmallDating is a different world now in Post-40 World than it was in Post-20 World.  Okay, if it is still the same world it was back then, then I’ve been dealt a new hand and the cards suck in this one.  Furthermore, when I was younger, I had more time to regroup the losses both emotionally and financially, I am not so young and not so cavalier about the consequences of poor choices.

I now know that one’s choice of a marital or romantic partner can affect your life forever, even long after they leave the scene. datinggumswap

It’s a high stakes game and I’m betting all or nothing on the best possibility for relationship, not just something that’s good enough or nice enough because I’m tired of being alone.

I am emotionally free from wondering if , maybe, when, how, what if anything will happen with The Beau or anyone else that is not knocking down my door or heating up my phone to connect with me.  I just know it won’t happen for me with someone who is merely lukewarm.

Even if it doesn’t work out with the Old Flame and The Beau, what’s he going to do? Come back and knock on my door and say, “Hey, you’re the lucky first runner up. Old Flame couldn’t fullfil her pageant responsibilities. Want to give it a go?”

Thanks, but that’s not exactly how I see my fairy tale playing out. I don’t know how exactly how I do see it playing out, but I’m fairly certain that scenario is not on the list.

So, to take The Beau’s and many of my readers’ and friends’ advice and especially my sister’s (she’ll so love this!)  I’m going to use this last episode with The Beau as  more than just an experience to do some creative writing.  I’m going to use it as an experience to reflect and further clarify for myself where I’m at and how I’m doing.  Let’s see if I can do it in 10 points or less.  Here we go.

The Points (not in any particular order):

  1. One’s choice of marital or romantic partner can affect the quality of the rest of your life.  This is true on a minor scale with those you date.  Choose wisely.
  2. The Wild Mind’s Love Philosophy still holds:  When a man is into a woman there is no doubt: he knows, she knows and there is no obstacle too great to overcome in order to make it happen.  He’ll find any way he can to get into her life, heart and, yes, pants.  This includes picking up the phone and calling her or driving distances to see her.  He won’t mind.  He’ll actually want to do it.
  3. Some people out there in Dating World are completely unavailable but they masquerade as completely available.  Do not believe this until proven. 
  4. Emotional availability is proven by scaling tall obstacles or great distances unasked and without hesitation or groaning.  It is also demonstrated a million other very creative ways all of which, every man knows capably how to execute, but won’t, unless you are the one he wants to be available for. If he’s not willing to prove availability in these ways, he’s just not that into you.
  5. Pay attention and trust your gut.  Read point Number 2 and if you experience doubts then he’s just not that into being into you. 😀 Move on now.  Don’t waste any more time.
  6. Men play just as many games as women.  Don’t deny it.  Some of these games are: “I Want Sex, But I’m Not Available For Any Serious Relationship, I’d Just Like To Make You Think I Am”, “I’m Bored With Nothing Better To Do, Come (yes, pun intended) Entertain Me”, “I’ll Play With You Till Something Better Comes Along” “I’m Completely Unavailable But Can’t Admit It”,and the final version, “Let’s Pretend” where he wants to pretend he’s really available so he can get sex or he’ll pretend he’s really into you even convincing himself he might be in hopes you will give him sex. The “Let’s Pretend” game is also played by those men who are hoping to get their mind off their own pain/loss/whatever for a while or by men who are married and won’t leave but can’t stay either.
  7. Women, do not go near these games!  If you do, you do so at your own peril.  Do not play the If…Maybe…What If?…Game. If you find out you are involved somehow in one of these games, get out yesterday. Don’t look back.  You deserve better.  You will also feel better.  Take charge of your health, get out now!pirates_of_the_caribbean_015 
  8. Being alone is still better than being in a relationship that is just okay or where you wonder all the time if he’s really all that into you.  Stop the wonder.  He’s not.  Move on. (I so need to remember this one myself!)
  9. My Prince Charming (or Adventurous Pirate) is out there and some day, if and when we meet, I will be ready and willing for the raping/pillaging and plundering to ensue.  (Okay…or for him to sweep me up on his magnificent steed time and time again until we are exhausted, then we’ll ride happily into the future together.) 😀
  10. Painting ceilings without a sprayer sucks.  Don’t ever do it. Next time, I’m buying beer and pizza and putting an ad on Craigslist that reads, “Free beer and pizza in exchange for painting help!” It’ll be a lot more fun.

Lights out. Curtain falls.

The End, Yes, Finally, The End!!!!

He Totally Fractured The Fairy Tale For Me With That One!

True IM conversation (I hate that new yahoo thing that shows me available even though I set unavailable as my preference):

Him:  Most men find it impossible to be monogamous. They just don’t tell you that.

Me:  I don’t believe it.

Who’s right?  Have I been completely mislead all my life? 

Please, let me know now, because if I’m going to go riding off with Prince Charming only to find out he wants to screw all the ugly stepsisters and other hot princesses in the surrounding kingdoms in spite of the fact that I work out and keep my girly figure, wax like crazy, feed him sammiches (even though I hate making them) and am willing and eager to provide sex no less often than every 72 hours (and that would be in a bad, hectic, stress-filled week), I’m so making other plans for the rest of my life!