Have you noticed how non-existent I am here? Like what’s up with that? The Wild Mind gets on and posts a wimpy (at best) post about Michael Jackson and then disappears. Hmmm, makes you wonder what I’ve been up to. Or…makes you wonder if I died like all the rest of the celebrities out there.
Okay, rest assured I haven’t died.
Yes, I have struggled a bit with writer’s block due to the fact that certain someone’s might be reading this blog and trying to read between the lines and of course I don’t want them to get the wrong impression so I….*deeep inhale* ….need to take a freaking breath and just write what I want to write. But also…and more importantly…I’ve struggled because my life is changing at light speed…due to my own initiative…thanks…and well…I just want to write about something more important than Fire Trucks and swimming pool pumps and hoses hooking up. I mean, as fun as that is…it is so not where I live and other things are motivating me right now. Sigh.
The Wild Mind is in a Wild State of Transition….I guess? Maybe?
Or…The Wild Mind is simply being proactive and deciding to live life…instead of merely writing about it after the fact?
Okay…all of the above is true.
Here’s what you (you being anyone interested besides The Wild Mind’s Self) need to know:
* yeah, okay, I admit…life has been busy and rather than write about how I’m accomplishing my New Year’s Resolutions, I am actually out there accomplishing them.
* I’m done with dating derelict men who are unavailable emotionally and legally or who are simply looking for a one night stand(or lay). I’m also done with spending time with anyone who cannot demonstrate a LOGICAL, RATIONAL, well informed and clearly articulated thought process when communicating. Since this eliminates 97% of all men on the planet and especially those who post profiles on all the dating sites (and, yes, sadly I’ve tried them all), I ‘ve completely given up on the dating thing.
“Why?” you ask.
“Because” I say, “I have so much better things to do with my life.”
Yeah, that’s it. I’ve decided to quit moping about my past failures. I’ve picked myself up and dusted myself off and am reinventing myself and my life and my future. I’m doing it because I can. I’m doing it because I still have the energy and health to do it….and I am loving every freaking minute of it! I’m.having.fun!
My mother was soooo right on. I should have done what I wanted to do to begin with instead of being so worried about pleasing the world and getting married simply because it was the socially acceptable fantasy at the time. Thank-you, Mom. Even though you never saw the fruit of your labor with me while alive, understand that your words like seeds were sowed deep in me and took root…albeit late…but they have taken root and sprouted and there is a bountiful harvest for sure! 🙂 I’m finally figuring out what I’m about…what I want and it has nothing to do with the presence or absence of some nondescript man in my life.
But it means I’m not having so much time to write, especially when it means that creative energy is spread out among 3 or more blogs, 4 children and one very viable contender for the Knight in Shining Armor Award. (Okay, screw the shining armor part, he’s just very interesting, intelligent, attractive, real…and…well…the best part is that so far his actions match his words and that is never a bad thing).
Yes, if he passes muster, you’ll hear about it. Until then, he’s only one who’s captured my imagination, sparked my interest and kept my interest far, far longer than most. If he rides off into the sunset it will be because he didn’t like the fact that I wanted to ride my own horse instead of hitching onto his. It will be because he wasn’t willing to move forward while I mounted my own gallant steed and caught up with him in a bit. It will simply be because he wasn’t able to or man enough to deal with a princess who is completely in charge of herself and doesn’t depend on a dashing prince to achieve her dreams. It will be because he ultimately felt insecure around me instead of inspired and motivated to be the best he could be. Somehow, this particular Knight, strikes me as being one who will make decisions for himself, and allow his Princess to make her own decisions, all the while as he’s got her back and spoiling her at every opportunity. Not because he has to, but becaue he’s totally into her and not afraid to declare it.
Dashing prince or not, The Wild Mind will create her own Fairy Tale Happy Ending. It will take an incredibly amazing and masculine and self assurred….even a bit arrogant…maybe cocky Prince to be able to roll with that.
Can you imagine just how interesting that relationship might be? Not your standard, let’s-go-to-bed-at-ten-and-do-the-same-three-things-we-always-do-in-the-same-order-at-the-same-time -like-a-circus-monkey kind of relationship now is it?
Actually, I was thinking that the Wild Mind’s audience are the wimpy ones. Where once there were 2 or 3 who left occasional comments, now even that 2 or 3 seem to have lost the initiative to punch in. Methinks the Wild Mind needs to get considerably Wilder if she expects to provoke a response. I suspect the paucity of comments also may stem from the nature of the topics (pools, hoses, gardens, children, Bridget Jonesian lamentations, etc.), which, let’s face it–and as you yourself have acknowledged–do not exactly fire the imagination like a jet engine. Surely you can keep a public diary of your day-to-day travails if you wish, but if you expect responsiveness, the Wild Mind better turn the dial up to GONZO and better earn her self-imposed moniker.
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Yes, Kip, I suspect you are right about getting considerably “wilder”. This is the dilemma. Do I really want to reveal all that goes on in there right here? I mean, how much of that might come back to bite me?
But turning the dial up to GONZO? That’s a term I’m not familiar with. See how really unedgy I am?
In any event, I’m taking a step back and re-evaluating what direction to take this. At the same time, my life seems to be bolting at mach 5 in about ten different directions which makes carving out the time to put forth anything of worth beyond the Bridget Jonesian lamentations a mere fantasy. Not making excuses, just stating facts.
And, if you recall the posts on hoses and especially the series on tools got a great deal of interaction. That, and the posts with “drama”! in them. Everyone loves drama! They’ll rake me over the coals for including it, but they do participate.
Anyway, just thinking about what to do with this blog right now is all.
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Yes, well, there’s no mystery about the hose attraction, is there? When in doubt, introduce prurience and the mob will take it from there (present company included).
And drama, well, of course. That’s why we read novels and go to plays and watch the tube and if we can’t find it there we create our own.
I expect you’ll keep doing with this blog what you’ve been doing all along. Doing your brain dumps, sifting and sorting the experience of your life, putting it out there for better or worse. Which is fine. But what do you really really want to achieve by doing this in a blog? What role to you want your audience to play, if any? If you want them to acknowledge their presence by talking back, you’re darn well gonna have to provoke them. Get out the big guns. Start spilling out the things we all think about but never say. The things we all want but never acquire. The things we’ve all suffered in silence. Sex, love, death, money. All the biggies. You go girl, I’ll be watching.
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That’s it, Kip! You just earned your own blog post response. Enjoy!
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