Text conversation this morning from a friend who recently got stillettoed by the latest love of his life and spent last night drinking to get her off his mind:
Him: Drinking Stillettos off my mind worked last night. I went 0-4 picking up on women. Seems everyone has a b/f or two. But the headache is great. Did you find $20 in your underwear this morning? I did.
Me: Really? Wow! You must have been firefighting last night. Whose fire I wonder?
Him: I don’t know. And no strangers in my bed this morning. Can’t find my keys. Can’t find my work badge.
Me: Geez! Do you still have your truck and hoses?
Him: Let me check.
Him: Dammit. The truck is gone!
Me: Holy Shit! There is a great big massive RED truck parked out front of my house. You should see the hoses on this thing!
Him: That truck gets around.
Me: Yeah, it looks pretty broke in.
Him: Hey! The truck gets polished up. 😉
Me: Polished, yeah, but these hoses are in sad shape! Ooops! The horn works.
Him: Those hoses will get the job done. Don’t you worry girl.
Me: Hmmm, no firemen on board, so it’s not looking good.
Him: They don’t know where the truck is either.
Me: That’s too bad. I’m such a morning person too. Dammit!
Hmmm, seems someone has a fire truck fixation going. Ah, well, might be better than that chicken issue a while back.