Here are some of the messages I’ve received lately at that online dating site that I’m on.
MrBigFinger: WOW…Your a very very pretty lady…And SoooooooooooooSEXY!!!!!!
Okay, now there is just something wrong with the MrBigFinger username and he can’t spell and he’s objectifying me. Okay, so I don’t really mind that he’s objectifying me but he needs to learn to spell and the big finger thing scares me…of course…if he were MrSmallFinger, I’d laugh.
Stilltrying says he has “a few extra pounds” (and judging from his pictures he certainly does) but he’s looking for “small petite women with brains” or “tall athletic women with brains” but remember, he’s got a few extra pounds so he can’t accept in her what he’s ready to settle for in himself. He also goes on to say he “despises stupidity” but most of the words in his profile are misspelled and the punctuation and capitalization are wrong too.
Then, of course, there is one in every bunch…the guy who totally looks too good to be true. Fun looking, great pic, all the “right” interests and seems to be able to write a complete sentence…but he just sends a flirt. Lame ass. Is that what I can expect in the relationship too? I gotta do all the work? I gotta set everything up? Next!
Then, and I’ve received this more times than I can count, there is the email message, “Hey!” Nothing else, just, “Hey!”. It’s one step up from a flirt but still gets the same “lame ass” rating as a flirt.
Then there’s the guy who after one initial “Hey thanks for contacting me” response to his email tells me he told the kids about me, showed them my pics, and then proceeds to bleed his whole life story out sans puctuation and conventional spelling.
My thoughts? “Uh, next!”
I could go on. It just makes me tired. In fact, it makes me so tired, I’m going to bed…alone…and that is just dandy with me if those are the options!