Thanks for being willing to share so much of your life with us Cat. It is hard to look back at the dreams that have been pushed aside by life. In my position all I can focus on is today. My future is so different from my past that I cannot do much dreaming. Between that and the emotional roller coaster, I am having my own little battle with PMS
Signifier,
I get what you are saying about the difficulty of looking back at the dreams that have been pushed aside by life. (Hmmm, sounds like a blog post brewing.)
I get myself in trouble there. It is probably time I looked at and modified some of my dreams, sadly, I have a really tough time doing that. That’s what sent me into the funk last night. For example, like the only real dream I wanted was the quality marriage, instead I ended up with the kids and no marriage. Now, don’t get me wrong, the kids, while often frustrating are my deepest joy and greatest comfort, but still…that intimate relationship with that “soul mate” or at least really, really, really close companion is something that I’d sure like to experience before Viagra prescriptions and retirement home duty becomes a mandatory part of the deal.
And, about your emotional roller coaster…too bad I don’t live closer, I’d be glad to spot you some childcare so you can have some time to just regroup. It gets better or, at least, it smooths out. Give it time.
And I am truly sorry. No one should ever have to bury a child and have one they love walk out on them. I’m thinking of you and praying for you…if it is of any comfort.
The Wild Mind 
Thanks for being willing to share so much of your life with us Cat. It is hard to look back at the dreams that have been pushed aside by life. In my position all I can focus on is today. My future is so different from my past that I cannot do much dreaming. Between that and the emotional roller coaster, I am having my own little battle with PMS
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Oh, crap!!!! Someone’s actually reading this???
Signifier,
I get what you are saying about the difficulty of looking back at the dreams that have been pushed aside by life. (Hmmm, sounds like a blog post brewing.)
I get myself in trouble there. It is probably time I looked at and modified some of my dreams, sadly, I have a really tough time doing that. That’s what sent me into the funk last night. For example, like the only real dream I wanted was the quality marriage, instead I ended up with the kids and no marriage. Now, don’t get me wrong, the kids, while often frustrating are my deepest joy and greatest comfort, but still…that intimate relationship with that “soul mate” or at least really, really, really close companion is something that I’d sure like to experience before Viagra prescriptions and retirement home duty becomes a mandatory part of the deal.
And, about your emotional roller coaster…too bad I don’t live closer, I’d be glad to spot you some childcare so you can have some time to just regroup. It gets better or, at least, it smooths out. Give it time.
And I am truly sorry. No one should ever have to bury a child and have one they love walk out on them. I’m thinking of you and praying for you…if it is of any comfort.
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