Alright, everybody’s already been up and at ’em and posted their good-byes to 2008 and their hopeful wishes for 2009 on their blogs already. In spite of my lack of originality on the topic, I’m still going to chime in with my perspectives on the transition from the last to the current year. It will, at very least, help me sort out all the varying and wayward thoughts streaming through my gray matter this morning…which this morning especially…feels particularly gray, like it is socked in under a deep cloak of tangible fog.
I am getting a late start so far on this first day of 2009 due in part to way too much celebratory cheer last night…and not getting to bed till nearly four this morning. Gads, that’s about the time my friends on the East Coast (should those be capitalized?) were getting up for the day. I do hope this slow beginning is not indicative of how the year will go. Unless, of course, slow is to be interpreted as peaceful, which is indeed how my day, particularly my morning progressed.
In spite of the slow, or maybe relaxing is a better word, start to my day, once I awoke at something like 9:30 this morning, I was wide awake, and thanks to lots of water, some ibuprofen and valerian root last night, no headache this morning. Well, okay, a minor headache due to too much vodka and not enough water or sleep last night. I should and have felt much worse in the past after drinking such quantities. I’m glad I feel fine this morning. What’s a temporary minor “heckake” as my dad used to call them?
I decided that, in spite of feeling particularly regretful about how the family celebrations last night transpired, I would not berate myself for the choices I made and instead choose differently in the future. In the spirit of this commitment, I got up and opened up the hot tub, fished out a mismatched two piece swim suit, made some coffee and enjoyed a steamy morning cuppa joe in my HT, completely alone, with the rain falling down around me. Ahhh, cool mist on my face, embryonically warm water enfolding me and warm brew inside me. As I enjoyed these physical sensations, I contemplated the past year and pondered as much as I could see down the road of the days ahead.
It feels like a different year, same ole stuff to me. Maybe that’s not such a bad thing.
I’ve gone on and on about the challenges 2008 posed for me. I don’t want to do that anymore. You can read more about my personal trials in previous posts here or at my other blog at Welcome to CABsPlace! 2008 actually began with the end of 2007 and if that pattern holds true, then 2009 is beginning with the end of 2008. This is not such a bad thing.
The end of 2008 is an improvement over 2008’s beginning. Life after divorce has stabilized. While the financial picture is still somewhat bleak, there is great improvement each and every month. My family is settling into the routine of our new life post-divorce. We are not in danger of foreclosure, bankruptcy, job loss or health issues that plague many, many others. We are indeed very fortunate and I am very grateful. We have each other, and we actually enjoy being with each other…most of the time. So, I guess, when I sort through all the things I’m feeling and thinking at this juncture of my life, I’m thinking I hope that none of these things change for the worse. Improved circumstances are always welcome but I’d be completely okay with the status quo remaining simply that.
I’m content to declare, “Out With The Old, In With the Same Ole, Same Ole”.
Yes, I’m going to put my list of hopes, dreams, goals, resolutions up eventually because I’m a believer that a written and spoken goal is far more likely to be achieved than an unspoken or unwritten one. But, I’ll not do that at this moment. I’m just pretty glad to enjoy this peaceful day that started with a cup of coffee in a hot tub. I do hope that this is some indication of how my year will be.