I guess I’m living life in all its reality. I mean, crap is happening…see my most recent post before this one about the drains in my house. And the sewer incident was preceeded by my car blowing it’s engine this summer, which was preceeded by a year of trauma with cars, including the rear differential of my 4×4 dropping right out onto the street sometime just before Christmas of last year. Due to my divorce a year ago…well…almost a year ago, finances have been tighter than I’ve ever known in my entire adult life. Debt is gradually and consistently getting paid off, and I know I won’t be in this place forever, but because I have no wiggle room, it is nothing short of a crisis when things outside the budget occur. So, that segment of my life is not the happy part of my reality.
Along with all the stress associated with having to live so very spartan-like and not having the money for extras of any kind…heck, I don’t even have the money for some of the essentials, at times…life has its joyous elements and moments. These moments splattered the crappy colors of my otherwise dismal financial reality with hope, energy, love and life.
For example, due to the dismal situation with my drains, I had to call my first ex to take my three oldest children. This resulted in them being gone for an entire week which was sad and very disappointing. On the up side, though, it gave me some concentrated time with my youngest. She slept with me every night and we were able to spend some fun time together in the evenings in spite of me having to complete some extra projects for work. This was a very happy result of a somewhat stinky situation.
I also mentioned the plumber coming over and bringing dinner and drinks. That ended up being very fun, and while it is still too soon to tell anything, he is definitely a decent man with a bit of heart and character to him. And, he doesn’t have a problem communicating about himself or his thoughts…and even better than that…it appears he is capable of taking responsibility for his actions. He’s continued to call me, we’ve gotten together one other time since the drain date, and while I’m not holding my breath, I think he will, at least, be a good friend if romance or reality doesn’t completely destroy us first.
Finally, while I’m working some insane hours because I have about three extra projects I agreed to take on (no I’m not getting paid…yes, I am networking and padding my resume), I am loving every minute. My students and I have this incredibly positive dynamic going in the classroom, the two other teachers I work with at my grade level are wonderful! It helps that they are men. There is no PMS-ing and the stress due to my colleagues having to have every little thing nailed down and signed in blood is completely gone. These two guys are nowhere near the definition of “control freak”. If I screw up the world doesn’t end, if they need to adjust something I’m way relaxed and able to flex with it. It soooo works for us…and it works for the kids too. I enjoyed working with my old team and my other grade level…but…there were points where it was toxic. Add to that the fact that I could have gone to grade level meetings for years (and did) and never have said one word and no one would have asked my opinion about anything, nor would they have cared. That is not the case with my current team. I contribute and they respect it. I like that. Plus, I really like the fact that they don’t PMS…
Living life in all its reality. The good with the bad. The tough times laced and threaded with really happy, nearly hysterically funny moments. Moments like the writing session I had this week where a student announced that he was going to share his writing on “How To Kiss a Girl” and I told him and the class, “Wait! First of all, I hope this will be rated G and in good taste.” Hmmm, that was almost as bad as the time in my first year of teaching when at the end of the P.E. session I instructed the students to “Hold your balls!” Not so good….but very funny! The kissing writing ended up being very sweet and very entertaining. My kids are not afraid to laugh and enjoy our class. This pleases me, no matter how backed up my drains are.
The good with the bad. Three of my kids had to live elsewhere this week and I missed them, but my second oldest got into the choir she tried out for as well as making it into the advanced drama class she auditioned for. My oldest passed her written driver’s test with flying colors but failed the driving portion. She’s taking it well and in 28 more days will be trying again. My son is in cross country and the change to middle school is working very well for him, even though he still hates doing yard work. At least I’m not having to harp on him about homework. He does it gladly these days. I can’t tell you how relieved I am. One man who expresses interest in getting to know me, goes silent, two more step in to take his place. The good with the bad. The bad with the good. Life in all its reality. It is never totally and completely a perfect fairy tale is it?
One thought on “The Good With The Bad…For Lack of a Better Title”
No, life is never totally and completely a perfect fairy tale, but nor is it totally a washout. And that’s reality.