Life is good…life sucks. I live with these two conflicting realities daily. I suspect I am not alone. Today alone life sucked and life was grand all in the same 24-hour period.
To start with, the weather continues to be record-breakingly hot. And, now, we are having fires in the area which creates smoke and haze. For me, since I’m not asthmatic, this is not a problem, but the haze has been so heavy that even I am struggling to enjoy breathing when outside. In addition, I am having to run my air conditioner, which translates into higher electric bills for me. That part of life sucks.
But, I was awakened this morning by the sound, of all sounds, thunder! The crisp, loud boom and crackle of thunder followed by the loud pelting of summer rain on my back deck covering was a welcome sound. It was a warm summer morning rain that brought momentary refreshment to what has been an exceptionally stifling hot summer. That was grand!
Then, somehow, the son, decided he wanted to be argumentative. You see, today is the day my three older children left to go for two weeks with their dad. He, of course, had not cleaned up his room and therefore I woke him up earlier than the other children so he could get that taken care of before he left. Yes, I’m a mean mom. I do expect that my children participate in chores and duties around the house…and a fairly orderly bedroom (not perfect, but orderly) is part of the deal for me. So, of course, I awakened him far too early and he grumbled and complained. I had to really hold my ground with him, and since he was really working hard to tick me off (and nearly succeeding) I had to continue to remind myself, this too shall pass. Life at that moment sucked.
Then, suddenly, the dad arrives, all the kids are tumbling out the door with their possessions and stuff and the house is, at once, wonderfully silent and dreadfully vacant. Life sucked but it was also grand all in the same moment.
Later today, I was tasked with helping my second oldest find a swimsuit for vacation. Not an easy task at this time of the year since there is little to choose from in our neck of the woods and also since her dad places such strict requirements on her for her attire. Searching every store in town sucked.
But then, finding the right swimsuit, which we finally did, at 70% off, was grand!
Spending the evening completely alone, doing whatever I want, whenever I wanted, was absolutely grand.
Listening to the thunder and anticipating another summer storm (which has not yet materialized) was also grand.
Missing my kids is not so grand. In fact, it sucks. I walk past their empty (clean, but empty) rooms and I miss them so deeply it physically hurts. Definitely, a not-so-grand experience.
Life is grand…and yet it sucks…all at the same time. This is what makes up our human experience.
And, fortunately for me, today, I did not experience any of those really devastaing blows such as the announcement that a loved one has a terminal disease or that I do. I didn’t learn that my spouse was no longer in love with me and I did not walk into a number of other very real tragedies that other people in this world are currently experiencing. I’m thinking of my friend across the country who mourns the loss of his mother who recently passed. In light of this, I am grateful that my kids love me, they are healthy, I am in good health and of sound mind…well, okay…at least mostly sound mind. I am employed and able to provide for those I am responsible for. I must conclude that though I am uncomfortable with or don’t like parts of my life, for the most part I really have it pretty good.
Life today, for me, is more on the grand than the not-so-grand side. I’m grateful for that.
What side of life are you on and why?
Cat (a.k.a. The Wild Mind)