Fixer Task Accomplished: Changing Lighting Fixtures

Okay, anyone out there reading this with any regularity knows how I’ve complained and cried about not being able to do my own fixer repairs around here.  It’s true.  I’m a home improvement disaster.  Actually, I am not a disaster, since I never attempt anything.  More precisely, I’m a home improvement wimp.

I don’t just screw things up…I can’t get far enough to do that.  I just sit and look at them…and think about what I want to do that I don’t know how to do.  And I moan about how I’d really like to fix this or that but I haven’t a clue.  Oh sure, I look at books, I get ideas, I read stuff.  None of that stuff shows you how to rip the freaking light fixture off the ceiling and put the wires together and put the whole mess back up in the ceiling so it looks good, works and doesn’t come crashing down on you when you walk past.

Ha!  All that changed this week…today actually.  I actually went to Lowe’s yesterday and got some epoxy and sealed the leak in the hot tub.  I should be able to begin refilling it tomorrow after I pick out a few of the leaves that found their way in.  If all goes well, I should have a warm, non-leaking tub by Christmas.

I have even better news than that!!!!  All my home improvement men friends out there and women friends will be glad to know that today, I successfully changed my first light fixture.  Well, I didn’t really do it all alone, but I was able to woo a tall, dark and handsome man friend into explaining and showing me how to do the project.  Okay, so I didn’t really woo him.  And…well, he was willing and able to show me how to do the the thing and let me get some hands on with it.  I mean, seriously, most guys just want to be saviors.  Don’t get me wrong.  That’s an incredibly attractive quality and if I was married to one of those types I’d be, like, soooo grateful and I’d be sure to show it profusely.  The reality is that I am not married to one of those savior types, they are all married to my good friends who justly deserve these great men. But, these great men are all busy doing their own work on their own homes being provider, protector and basic sexy, handsome, strong man to their wives, and they can’t just be dropping by to fix my light fixtures for me or set up the mold for my concrete or whatever.  And that is all as it should be.

So, what changed?

Whew!  I met someone who actually can teach me how to do this stuff without expecting me to sleep with him.  We actually met online…and after two dates the feeling was pretty mutual that there just wasn’t the connect we were both looking for.  However, cool guy that he is, he told me up front that he didn’t think things were probably going to get romantic where he was concerned (I breathed a big sigh of relief on that one) and he mentioned that he would really be interested in being friends.  Now, folks, women have a different opinion of what it means to be friends than men do.  Women can sustain opposite sex friendships more easily than men can I think.  So, when a man says he’s interested in developing a platonic friendship, I’m okay with that.  It’s not a friends with benefits deal here and I make that clear.  It was clear in this case. 

He offered to show me how to change out the light fixture.  We changed the failing light fixture in the kitchen and I am so embarrassed that I’ve sat and stared at all the ugly light fixtures in my home thinking that changing them on my own is beyond me.  I am seriously blushing at how easy the whole project was.  The worst part was not the wiring, it was the screws to attach the fixture to the bracket.  That was a bit tricky.  Once that was figured out, it was all a snap. Nice thing about this guy, he was really a teacher too.  He told me things along the way that I might need to look for in other situations.  Like, he told me to turn on the switch before we screwed the light in completely to make sure it worked.  Little stuff like that really helps.

Anyway, I’m no longer a light fixture virgin.  I’m so excited.  I feel like a real woman now!  LOL!  I can’t believe it.  I just want to run up to Lowe’s and replace every light fixture in the house!  I’ve been empowered and I love it!!!!

Okay, enough of the silly stuff.  I am going to replace at least two other light fixtures this break just to make sure I have my skills down.  Then I’ll move on to the ceiling fan in the dining area. 

You wait.  I’m going to write that book on home repair for single moms.  Hey, it’ll go over just as well as my “How To Screw Up A Really Good Meal” reality t.v. show. 

Men, please, teach your daughters this stuff.  They are going to need it!

Peeved about the Plumbing

I’m in the process of reading Upton Sinclair’s book, The Jungle, about the Chicago meat packing industry.  Jargis, the main character, heads to America to make his fortune and is met with misfortune after misfortune after misfortune.  He seems to survive but just barely and gradually becomes the worse for the wear.  He ultimately falls in with what Sinclair dubs as “high class criminals” and things get better for him but only because he resorts to criminal acts. 

I once heard it said that it was not money that corrupts, but poverty. 

I have not had a happy experience reading Sinclair’s book.  But at the same time, I’ve been immensely relieved reading this book.

It is depressing, nothing goes right, the people Jargis love all die and he has to give up his morality and decency to survive. 

His struggles mirror my own over the last year and a half all too closely.  At the same time, this book  descriptively elaborates for me that not only could my situation be far worse, it describes in painful detail just exactly how much worse and in what ways. 

After two really poor marital choices, I am in the same boat many people my age are.  I’m over 40, single and reeling financially from a divorce that left me with more month at the end of my money than I care to experience.  I own my house, but I couldn’t sell it for what I owe.  It is a real fixer and needs more work done to maintain it than I can afford right now, and not being handy, the task of learning to do any of it myself is nothing short of overwhelming and terrifying.  Of course, tonight the drains backed up as they usually do at this time of the year because of roots growing into the drainage pipes. I can’t call the plumber because it would be extra charges and I just paid all the bills and there isn’t enough left over anyway.  Hmmm, which bills do I pay late on now?  This last year and a half has felt like one onslaught of financial disaster after another and with four children at home, it isn’t like I can get a second job in the evenings. It’s been a tough year. In many ways, I feel the hopelessness of Jargis, working and working and falling further and further behind.

On the other hand, my experience is vastly different than Jargis’ and I am grateful.  I haven’t had any of my children die.  I get paid pretty decent wages, which, as the debts get paid off will become more than they seem to be now. And, unlike Jargis, I am making progress in a positive direction, just not as quickly or painlessly as I would otherwise wish.  I’m not transplanted to another country where I don’t know the language and the rules of the society.  I enjoy my job and do not have to do dull labor day in and day out. I do own my own home and don’t have to worry when a landlord will evict me because they want to sell their home.  I am able to make my payments and foreclosure is not a reality for me, like it is for so many others across the country in these discouraging economic times.  My experience is nowhere near Jargis’ on so many levels and as I read this book, I am more and more appreciative of the times I live in and the fact that I really do have so much. 

I’m still really peeved that the drains backed up tonight. 

I wonder if, when I look back on this period of my life, I will remember it as Dickens said, “It was the best of times. It was the worst of times.” ?